How to Stop Chasing and Start Living: Finding Joy in the Present Moment
- Anca Alexandra Pasareanu
- Oct 15
- 9 min read
Contents
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A Tuesday That Taught Me to Pause
It was a Tuesday—not particularly memorable. That Tuesday began like any other. The alarm went off, the kettle whistled, and I checked my calendar. Meetings stacked up like dominoes. My to-do list felt endless. Yet, in the quiet corner of my attic, as sunlight sliced lazily through the blinds, something shifted. The light was golden, almost tangible.
Dust motes floated in it like tiny galaxies. For a fleeting moment, I wasn’t rushing. I wasn’t reacting. I was simply—existing. I was practicing mindful living in the present moment.
I realized how rarely I practiced mindful living in my daily life. How often life is reduced to task completion, clicks, and notifications. And in that stillness, I noticed the small, almost invisible rhythms of life around me—the soft purring of my cats, the distant hum of the street, the tick of the clock marking time I usually ignore.
A Strange Kind of Ache
There was a mix of stillness and sadness that came over me. The stillness felt grounding. The sadness? That surprised me.
It was the ache of realization—that I’ve spent so much of my life waiting. For things to align. For clarity. For the next big thing. I’ve filled my time with striving and noise and movement, always thinking that fulfilment was just one more achievement away.
But in that quiet space, I felt the tenderness of all the nows I’d ignored. How much life had passed through my hands unnoticed, unloved, unappreciated.
I felt a softening inside, like a long-held breath finally released. That ache wasn’t unpleasant—it was awakening.
Learning to Stop Chasing and Start Living
In that moment of pause, something became startlingly clear: I’ve built a life on chasing.
Chasing recognition, chasing milestones, chasing goals, chasing some elusive version of “enough” that always seemed just out of reach. I thought the next achievement, the next deadline, the next praise would finally make me feel complete. But in the pursuit, I overlooked the texture of life itself.
I missed sunsets that painted the sky in impossible shades of pink and gold. I ignored the gentle nudges of my own intuition, dismissing that quiet inner voice as impractical or irrelevant. I failed to be fully present with the people I love—rushing through conversations, multitasking during shared moments, taking their laughter and words for granted.
I mistook movement for meaning, thinking that constant activity equalled progress, that busy-ness equalled fulfilment.
And for years, I hadn’t even noticed. That realization was both humbling and, paradoxically, freeing. Humbling because it made me face the ways I had allowed life to pass unobserved. Freeing because it revealed a choice I hadn’t fully acknowledged before: I could stop. I could pause. I could witness the life that had been happening all along, quietly, in the spaces I had ignored.
It allowed me to question: if fulfillment isn’t in the chasing, where is it?
And slowly, quietly, the answer became clear. Fulfilment isn’t out there, waiting at some far-off horizon, some next success, some future moment. It’s here. It’s now. It’s in the quiet presence of this exact moment, in breathing fully, noticing deeply, and being fully alive in the ordinary, unremarkable fragments of life.
In the stillness, I realized: life is not something to be conquered. It’s something to be witnessed, experienced, and honoured, moment by moment. And when I give myself permission to do that—to simply be—I find that what I’ve been chasing all along was already waiting for me in the present.
Lessons from Slowing Down
Being constantly in motion is not truly living; it’s merely surviving. We fill our days with endless tasks, schedules, and obligations, convincing ourselves that busyness equals purpose. Productivity is often mistaken for progress, as if checking boxes can substitute for genuine experience.
We believe we must earn rest, earn peace, earn love—like they are privileges granted only after enough effort. But what if that’s a lie we’ve been telling ourselves? What if true insight, true fulfillment, and real connection aren’t waiting at some distant finish line, but quietly exist in the moments we habitually rush through?
It is in the mundane, the unremarkable, the spaces between accomplishments that life’s richest lessons often reside. A pause before answering a call, the warmth of sunlight on your skin, the sound of your own steady breath—these moments, fleeting as they are, carry meaning we rarely acknowledge.
They remind us that life isn’t about constant motion or achieving more; it’s about noticing, being present, and allowing ourselves to simply exist. And in that noticing, in that gentle presence, we discover the depth, joy, and clarity we’ve been chasing all along.
Presence isn’t just a practice—it’s a form of love, both for ourselves and for the world around us. It’s the conscious act of leaning fully into a moment, of offering our undivided attention without judgment or distraction. When I give my full attention to a single moment—to a person, to a feeling, to my own breath—I’m quietly affirming: “This matters. You matter. I matter.”
It is in these acts of presence that love is both expressed and received, often in ways far subtler than grand gestures or loud declarations.
I’ve learned to notice and appreciate the unremarkable moments—not only the milestones we celebrate but the micro-moments that slip by unnoticed: the warmth of a coffee mug in my hands, the fleeting glance of someone passing by, the gentle birdsong drifting through my window.
These tiny experiences, seemingly ordinary, are actually the threads that weave a life worth living. They are reminders that meaning is not only found in extraordinary events, but in the quiet, tender spaces of daily life. In practicing presence, I’ve discovered that these small moments accumulate, creating a life that feels rich, grounded, and deeply connected.
Bringing Mindfulness into Everyday Life
I began with a simple experiment: practicing mindful living in the present moment for 90 seconds. Before emails, before calls, before saying yes to another commitment, I stop. I calm my mind, breathe, and ask, “What do I actually feel right now?”
I’ve also reclaimed my mornings. No rushing, no immediate tasks. Just coffee, journaling, and observing the changing light. It’s not about productivity; it’s about remembering that I am alive.
This tiny shift, though subtle, is powerful. It transforms the ordinary into something sacred. It reminds me that being present is not passive—it is active participation in life itself.
“We are not human doings. We are human beings.” — Jon Kabat-Zinn
Right Now
Right now, I’m choosing to show up fully, even if nothing seems “happening.” I’m learning that presence isn’t dependent on excitement, drama, or achievement. It doesn’t wait for a perfect scenario or a special occasion. Presence is simply being here, in this moment, with awareness and intention. Even the mundane, when truly observed, becomes meaningful.
Because being here, fully, is enough. Right now is all you truly have. Yesterday has passed—its successes and failures alike are behind you. Tomorrow is not guaranteed; it remains uncertain and unseen. All that exists, all that we can truly touch and feel, is this very moment, this breath, this heartbeat.
So I’m reminding myself to slow down, to notice, to honour this moment—not as preparation for what comes next, but as the fullness of life itself. Right now is where change begins, where peace can be found, where gratitude and love are experienced. Right now, I am alive. Right now, I am enough.
We Act in This Life Like Chasing a Ghost
So often, we believe happiness is tucked away in the next big thing—the next promotion, the next milestone, the next goal checked off a never-ending list. We chase it relentlessly, thinking it’s always just out of reach, always somewhere in the future. And in that chase, we rarely pause to notice what’s already here.
But joy is not a destination. It doesn’t announce itself with fanfare. It is subtle, quiet, and often overlooked. It whispers in the brush of a breeze against your cheek on a warm afternoon. It giggles in the laughter of a friend across a crowded room. It hums softly in the quiet stretch between songs, the half-empty cup of coffee you forgot to drink in a rush, or the way sunlight drips lazily across the floor.
These moments, seemingly unremarkable, carry life itself—but only if we stop long enough to notice them.
By always chasing, we risk missing life entirely. Every hurried step, every unchecked task, every “later” we attach to happiness keeps us moving past the very experiences that could fill us with meaning. And yet, when we pause, even for a moment, something shifts. Time stretches. Attention deepens. The ordinary transforms into the extraordinary, simply because we are present.
Pausing doesn’t mean stopping your life; it means stepping fully into it. It means letting the small, often ignored details have their moment of significance. It means seeing that the world isn’t just a backdrop to our ambitions—it’s the stage where real life unfolds, waiting quietly, always ready to be noticed. In that noticing, we find clarity, connection, and a joy that doesn’t chase or vanish—it lives here, in the richness of now.
What’s the Most Important Moment of Your Life?
It’s not about graduations, promotions, weddings, or births. It’s this exact moment, quiet or chaotic, ordinary or extraordinary, that holds the greatest meaning. RIGHT NOW is where life is truly happening, and it’s the one moment you can fully embrace.
What's the Most Important Place You’ve Been?
It’s not defined by a city, a house, or a landmark. It’s wherever you are fully present—whether in a forest, a coffee shop, or simply your living room. RIGHT HERE is where you can feel at home in yourself, attentive and alive.
What's the Most Important Thing You’ve Done?
It’s not about achievements or accolades. It’s the act of paying attention, showing up, and giving yourself permission to stop running. WHAT YOU DO RIGHT NOW—being present—is the most meaningful action you can take. Stop chasing happiness and start mindful living.
Pause, Notice, and Be Present
For just a moment, allow the world to simply be as it is—without needing to fix, control, or rush through it. Let go of the to-do lists, the notifications, the constant pull to be somewhere or accomplish something. Instead, pause. Breathe. Notice.
Pay attention to the subtle details around you: the way light shifts across a room, the gentle rustle of leaves, the distant hum of life carrying on without your interference. What do you feel when you release the striving—the tension in your shoulders, the tightness in your chest, the racing thoughts in your mind? Let yourself simply observe without judgment.
Notice what emerges when you truly pause: the soft textures under your fingertips, the quiet rhythm of your own breath, the smell of coffee, the distant call of a bird, the sound of your own heartbeat. These small, often overlooked sensations are more than just fleeting experiences—they are the building blocks of awareness and presence.
In these quiet, intentional pauses, you can begin to reconnect with what really matters. You might discover clarity in your thoughts, tenderness in your emotions, or a sense of groundedness that has been missing in the rush of daily life.
These reflections, though subtle and silent, have the power to transform the way we live. They remind us that to actually live, we must sometimes stop moving—and simply be.
An Open Question for You
What are you running from when you stay busy?
And who might you become if you slowed down… just enough to listen?
You’re not behind. You’re not broken. You’re not late.
You’re just here. And here is enough.
Frequently Asked Questions
How can I practice being present in my daily life?
Practicing mindful living in the present moment starts with small, intentional pauses throughout your day. You can focus on your breath, notice subtle details around you, or simply slow down before reacting to a notification or task.
Techniques like mindful journaling, savouring a cup of coffee, or taking a short walk without distractions can help you fully engage with the present moment. The key is consistency—over time, these small acts of awareness can transform your relationship with life.
Why is living in the moment important for mental health?
Living in the moment reduces stress, anxiety, and feelings of overwhelm by shifting your attention away from past regrets or future worries. Mindful presence allows you to connect with your emotions, appreciate small joys, and cultivate gratitude.
Research shows that practicing mindfulness strengthens emotional resilience, improves focus, and increases overall well-being, helping you feel more grounded and fulfilled in daily life.
What are practical ways to stop chasing and start noticing life?
To stop chasing and start noticing life, begin with intentional micro-moments of pause. Examples include: taking a few deep breaths before starting a task, noticing the sensation of sunlight on your skin, or giving someone your full attention without multitasking.
Reducing unnecessary busyness, setting boundaries with technology, and creating quiet routines can also help you slow down and experience life fully. These practices teach that fulfilment is not in constant striving—it’s in being fully present.
